The Princess Diaries

The Princess Diaries

Walt Disney Pictures

Film released 2001

Director: Gary Marshall

Writer: Gina Wedkos

Based on the books by Meg Cabot

Starring: Julie Andrews, Anne Hathaway, Hector Elizondo, Heather Matarazzo, Mandy Moore, that guy from Brink, Sandra Oh!

Rated: G

Grade:  4/5

Not another TWEEN movie! Let’s take a queer look at that old favorite, The Princess Diaries.

Can you believe this was Anne Hathaway’s big film debut? Neither can I. ALSO JULIE ANDREWS FTW! Btw, did you know that Whitney Houston was a producer on this? Cool, right?

Now that I’m done fangirling over the powerhouse actors in this movie, let’s get on with it.

First, let’s get a few things straight (wink wink). If you were a tween during the late 90s/early 2000s, then you might have been obsessed with the original books series (like me). 

'Sup Meg Cabot

There were a few things that the movie didn’t get quite right that I want to point out quickly. Whether or not they contribute to the movie’s queerness, eh idk, you can be the judge of that. The two biggest things you need to know are 1) Mia’s dad isn’t dead, he was just kind of an absent father until they had to tell her about the whole Princess thing. Ultimate uncool dad move. And 2) the grandmother in the books is actually a horrible human being that Mia hates and she has tattooed eyebrows that gave me nightmares. Ugh. These changes make sense for the movie’s story arc, but what I liked about the original books was Mia’s rebellious, fuck the man, attitude, and she really loses that in the movie. Having her dad die instead of just being absent puts a sentimentality and “excusable reason” on her rebellion, which lessens Mia’s queerness. And the grandmother (if memory serves me, I think she had to call her grandmere?) served as an antagonistic figure on whom Mia could throw her frustrations. As much as I love Julie Andrews, the conflict between traditional norms/the strictures of being royal and Mia wanting to be a normal freaky teenager get diluted.

Anyway, on to the film.

Mia is so very queer. She and her bestie Lily Moscovitz (the awesome and OUT Heather Matarazzo) are outsiders at their high school. 

Who's that dude messing up our bestie pic?

They look at the popular, uber-hetero, kids with admiration and disgust; that particular mixture of feelings only present in the teenage mind when you still gave two fucks about your popularity status (right?). Mia is invisible and weird to her classmates. She pukes during her public speaking class and gets laughed out the door. She’s awkward and clumsy, not to mention the glasses and untameable hair. She’s invisible, crushing on cool-guy-douchebag Josh from afar, wishing she wasn’t queer, and wishing for the popular kids’ normalcy. It’s hard out there for a queer.

But Mia’s got some things going for her. She lives in an abandoned firehouse (LITERALLY THE COOLEST THING EVER) with her artist mom whose idea of a night in is throwing darts at water balloons full of paint, 

Take that patriarchy!

and she works part time at a rock climbing place. Her life isn’t really as bad as she makes it out to be. Despite her frustrations, her queer life is actually pretty cool.

Then, everything changes. Julie Andrews comes to town and tells her she’s next in line for the throne of Genovia. Oof. This little queer girl is a bonafide princess. You can’t get much more normative and traditional than a princess, no matter whether you are talking about fairytales or IRL royalty. The whole movie ends up being about Mia’s identity and her queerness battling the normative expectations closing in on her life.

Here are the two things I want to look at with this.

First, the big beauty transformation. Hellooooooo Anne Hathaway.

bow chika wow wow

What’s telling here is her reaction to the makeover. It makes her super uncomfortable. She gets really defensive when Lily sees her new ‘do. And when she gets to school she doesn’t want to show off her new look, she hides it all under a hat. When someone finally steals the hat off her head, her newfound normative beauty makes heads turn. People start to notice her, but it’s not really what she wants. She doesn’t know what to do now that she’s no longer invisible. She’s lost some of her queerness and she’s having a hard time adjusting. She’s starting to conform to normative beauty standards and it feels weird, unnatural even.

Next, her decision to become a princess (after she tries to run away). I’m not so interested in the whole legacy, father part of the storyline. I want to focus on how Mia eventually comes to terms with her queerness and this new normative world she must navigate.  The defining moment here is when she smears ice cream all over popular-girl Lana’s (Mandy Moore in her early 2000s prime) pristine cheerleading outfit. Mia decides that, after the whole beach party/Josh fiasco, there are parts of the normative world she doesn’t want to participate in. The part that’s frivolous and fake and judgemental and basically just awful. Instead (and after quite a bit of turmoil), she decides to take advantage of the position she has been handed within the normative world. She decides to use her queerness to infiltrate and invade that normative world. She decides to “care about the other 7 billion people out there instead of just [her].” She decides to be an advocate and voice for the people. She realizes how much power she has access to and that she can use that power for good.  I think this is an incredible model for how those with enormous privilege should use their voices to lift up those 7 billion+ people who do not have the same power/resources/rights/etc. You go girl!

As you wish, Julie Andrews

MVQ: Mia’s mom! She’s the coolest. I mean the paint-balloon thing! The firehouse! Genius.

OTP: Lily and Mia. Does a ship name for them exist? Mily? Lia?

Favorite Moment: Mia coning Lana!

The Little Mermaid

The Little Mermaid

Disney Animation

Film released 1989

Directors: Ron Clements & John Musker

Writers: John Musker & Ron Clements

Based on the fairytale by Hans Christian Andersen

Music & Lyrics: Alan Menken & Howard Ashman

Starring: Jodi Benson, Pat Carroll, Samuel E Wright, Kenneth Mars

Rated: G

Grade:  3/5

We’re back to the classics today!

Let’s dive into the deep with this one.

First, we’ve got the walking and talking human world with Prince Eric and his regal cohorts. Then, we’ve got the swimming and fishies of the underwater world, complete with trident.

Queer vs norm is always difficult when we are dealing with two worlds because the main character usually transitions from one world to another. Let’s start at the beginning with Ariel.

Evidence of Ariel’s queerness lies in her love for Eric (it’s kind of creepy stalker love, but oh well), Trident’s reaction to it, and finally Ursula. Let’s break it down.

Ariel is a total misfit amongst her royal mermaid family.  She’s late for her singing debut, she doesn’t hang out with her fellow mer-teens. She’s also a total hoarder. But most of all, she wants to be where the people are. Not mer-people. People-people. She dreams of a place completely out of her reach, outside of her world. She dreams of a home for her queerness.  “Part of Your World” is Ariel’s ode to her queerness and her longing for a place where she can be herself.  

I whip my hair back and forth

It reminds me of the period in my life where I was out to myself and started exploring my queerness, but I was still hiding my L Word Netflix history and hadn’t really come out yet. I collected gay culture, researched, and read anything Google would point me to on “how to be a lesbian,” but I wasn’t actually a part of that world yet.

Side note: I wonder about the implications of a trans* interpretation here, of a girl who grows up feeling like she is somehow in the wrong body; that she should have legs instead of a fin….interesting.

This little piggy went to the gay bar...

And major points to Ariel for taking up the hero’s mantle and saving Prince Eric, her damsel in distress. At first I thought this was really subversive and cool, but taking another look at it, Disney is mostly just abiding by ancient mermaid mythology where the mermaid saves the drowning human-dude. Well, points for sticking to a vaguely feminist history of mythology?

Lose some weight, why dontcha?

On to dear old dad. When King Trident finds out about her secret human love and her collection of bits and bobs and thingamawhatsits, he flips his shit. His reaction to Ariel’s forbidden love (sound familiar) represents old school homophobic ideals that are still very real. This mentality gets out kids kicked out on the street, or in Ariel’s case, left out at sea.

You can't sit with us

And who comes to save her? Ursula. Or, The Drag Mother Supreme. Did you know that Ursula’s character design was modeled off of the noted drag queen Divine?!? Cool, right? 

Weeeeerk

But, she’s another queer villain. Ugh. Again? Disney? I’m getting pretty tired of this trope. At least she has a kickass song? But what’s interesting about her very clear queerness in her animation is that she facilitates Ariel’s transition from the underwater world to the human world.  Ursula acts as a kind of queer guide. While she fulfills Ariel’s queer wish (within the underwater world) to get rid of her fins in lieu of legs, she forces Ariel to maintain a queer status (in the human world) by taking her voice. Ariel’s differently-abled-ness (and obvious cultural naivety) keep her queer. And that’s all Ursula’s doing.

But, despite Ariel’s queerness, her character just completely falls flat in the second half of the movie. 

My bow is as big as my face...

She loses all her agency (not that she had tons to begin with) and drive and the whole thing turns into a bitch fest between her and Ursula as her human alter-ego and the movie gets way less interesting and a little emotionally scarring between the lack of consent in “Kiss The Girl” and Ursula turning into a ship-wrecking monster.

But Sebastian always manages to keep it real.

THE HILLS ARE ALIVE

MVQ: First half of the movie Ursula, not human-Ursula or monster-Ursula.

OTP: Sebastian and the French cook. It’s the classic he’s-mean-to-you-because-he-has-a-crush-on-you schoolyard scenario. Except the stakes are a little bit higher.

Favorite Moment: “Part of Your World” takes the cake.

ACTUAL REPRESENTATION: Steven Universe

Let's shake things up a bit, shall we.

I'm gonna mix up the schedule a bit and once a month I'm gonna do a post about actual LGBTQ+ representation in kids' media. Honestly, I wish I could do it more often, but there just isn't enough material to cover :( Maybe one day...

As you may have caught on, a lot of what I've been talking about here is made up mostly from my imagination. The queer representation I talk about in the films/tv shows/books/whatever for kids isn't real. Because this kind of representation barely exists, I decided to create it for myself.

But the times they are a-changin' (albeit slowly). And there is some LGBTQ+ representation out there for young people. AND I WANNA TALK ABOUT IT!

For my inaugural Actual Representation post, I wanna talk about my favorite tv show right now: STEVEN UNIVERSE!

It's on Cartoon Network, created by Rebecca Sugar (CN's first ever female creator!) and it's awesome. Click my face to learn more about the show and it's awesome LGBTQ+ representation in kids' media (you should also subscribe to my YouTube Channel).

And here's a video of Ruby and Sapphire fusing into Garnet (voiced by Estelle!)

I've watched that video so many times, it's just not even funny at this point. Definitely cried the happiest of tears the first time. 

This moment is seriously ground-breaking! The show is already so queer in its representation of women as positive role models, and alternative family structures (plus they're aliens and Steven is half alien and that definitely sounds non-normative to me) that throwing Ruby and Sapphire's relationship into the mix is just the gem on top of a perfect banana split. 

What's cool about Steven Universe and Garnet's story is that while Ruby and Sapphire's romantic relationship has been confirmed by the creators, their relationship is totally out in the open. They are clearly and explicitly in a strong, stable, romantic relationship and it's NBD. There is no shame from the series itself or the characters about the relationship. Shows like Adventure Time and The Legend of Korra hint at romantic same-sex relationships within the cartoons themselves (Bubbline and Korrassami) but they've only been revealed (or made canon) by the creators. I'm super skeptical of shows doing this because how many kids do you know watch these shows and immediately Google whether the creators have said if those characters are in same-sex relationships? Maybe I'm wrong but I think it unlikely, as internet-savvy as kids might be these days. 

What do you think about Steven Universe and its LGBTQ+ representation for kids? I can't wait for the show to come off hiatus and for Steven to officially meet Ruby and Sapphire and for the characters (not the creators) to talk about the relationship.

ALSO, I've started contributing to VProud.tv (an awesome new troll-free video platform started by former YouTube/Google Exec Karen Cahn that's for women, by women, and aims to start honest conversations on the internet!) and you can join the conversation I've started about Steven Universe there. Ok, plugging done.

Brave

Brave

Pixar Animation Studios

Film released 2012

Directors: Mark Andrews, Brenda Chapman, Steve Purcell

Writer: Brenda Chapman, Mark Andrews, Steve Purcell, Irene Mecchi

Starring: Kelly Macdonald, Billy Connolly, Emma Thompson, Robbie Coltrane, Kevin McKidd, Craig Ferguson

Rated: PG

Grade: 3/5

I was in Scotland all last week so it felt appropriate to take a look at Pixar’s BRAVE!

 

SO MANY SHEEP

Guys, this came out in 2012. How crazy is that?!? Pixar’s first and only (up until this summer’s release of Inside Out) female-led film. I love you Pixar, but you really need to get better with the whole representation thing…

Anyway, so this movie…I’m curious what other people have to say about this one. I wish it was my favourite Pixar movie, truly I do. But, it’s just not. That’s not to say that it’s a bad movie. By all standards, it’s a good movie. The animation is gorgeous (as always) 

Now how do I get back down....

and Merida is such a rebellious bad-ass. But it’s not great. And I don’t expect anything less than greatness (in terms of storytelling) from Pixar. It’s good, but it’s not as good as you want it to be. I’ve been trying to pin point why I feel this way, and I’ve maybe found an answer. Let’s start at the beginning.

I love the first part of this movie. It’s super feminist and interesting and queer and breaks all kinds of stereotypes. You’ve got this mother/daughter thing, dealing with the old versus the new. Merida is this adventurous, tomboy teen (although I wish she didn’t always have to wear dresses, that would have bothered me as a kid) who goes around shooting stuff with her bow and arrow, climbing mountains on her horse, drinking from the waterfall of fire, and generally kicking major ass. 

I'm ginger and I know it

Her mother, on the other hand, is steeped in the tradition of her people, although she definitely has her own moments of queerness. Here’s where they differ: Merida is all about freedom and adventure and expressing herself with her curly ginger locks blowing in the gales, while her mother channels those same impulses through the strictures of her tradition. She adheres to the normative code of what princesses and queens should and should not do and tries to confine Merida to those rules. Momma queen is able to take those rules in stride and totally dominate within that world. The mother/daughter feud that springs from their old versus new ways is the common struggle of the generations, particularly between generations of activists. Think Act Up Fight AIDS and their aggressive campaigns versus today’s Marriage Equality movement which wages its battle through politics and policy pushing. It’s not a perfect parallel, but I think you get the idea.

Merida, the patriarchy is everywhere, there is no escape

THEN we get to the whole heteronormative marriage tournament thing. I really love the visual metaphor here of her hair getting covered up by that weird hood thing she has to wear with her confining fancy dress, and she keeps pulling one tiny ringlet of ginger curl out from under it even though her mother keeps tucking it back. Brava, Pixar. 

BO-RINGLET

Strong metaphor for Merida’s personal expression and individuality. The tournament itself is your typical patriarchal BS, but then Merida wins her own hand through a sneaky loophole and some insane archery skills. WHICH IS SO AWESOME AND FEMINIST AND I WISH THIS MOVIE CAME OUT WHEN I WAS A KID!

And then the movie gets eh…

The bear doesn't like its own plot twist #meta

Merida gets mad at her mom and tries to find the Will of the Whisps (magic stuff) to get her to understand where she is coming from. And then she accidentally turns her mom into a bear…While she does visit a witch-ish character, that just doesn’t really make up for how much I dislike this plot “twist.”

From a storytelling perspective, I just don’t think they introduced the magical aspects of the world very well. And they completely drop the really interesting feminist/queer stuff in lieu of this bear-transforming thing that happens. The plot had so much potential! And they just drop it all because they want to do this weird mother/daughter oops I turned you into a bear and now we need to undo the thing that I did so you can be human again plot. Ugh, boring. Do any Pixar movies even explore father/son relationships? No, I don’t think so. (Well, they kind of do in Finding Nemo but that still manages to be an awesome adventure story and Nemo and Marlin are barely on screen together.)

If Pixar had chosen to do a different Viking film with a male protagonist, he would have been going on adventures and doing cool Viking stuff, not turning his mom into a bear and then trying to undo that mistake. That’s probably why How To Train Your Dragon is the better Viking movie.

Here’s my alternative version of the movie: Merida runs away from home after the tournament to fight dragons (or bears, whatever) and and see the world and do everything a boy can – skipping all the bear-transforming nonsense and actually meeting people on her travels and finding out what it is like to be an independent woman in this world and making some self-discoveries along the way - and then when she gets herself in too much of a pickle, her mom would show up to save the day and reveal herself as the bad ass she truly is and female empowerment and bridging the generations and YAY. It would end the same way, with the marriage thing chucked out the window and Merida would let her hair fly free as she rides with her newly liberated momma by her side. That would have been an epic movie.

And they all lived happily ever after

Got a better alternative version?

Also, did I mention that Merida is totally a lesbian?

MVQ: Her dad! He’s awesome. And his impression of Merida is spot on.

OTP: Merida and her badass self.

Favorite Moment: The split screen talk between Momma Queen and Poppa Viking and Merida and her horse. Brilliant.