The Princess Diaries

The Princess Diaries

Walt Disney Pictures

Film released 2001

Director: Gary Marshall

Writer: Gina Wedkos

Based on the books by Meg Cabot

Starring: Julie Andrews, Anne Hathaway, Hector Elizondo, Heather Matarazzo, Mandy Moore, that guy from Brink, Sandra Oh!

Rated: G

Grade:  4/5

Not another TWEEN movie! Let’s take a queer look at that old favorite, The Princess Diaries.

Can you believe this was Anne Hathaway’s big film debut? Neither can I. ALSO JULIE ANDREWS FTW! Btw, did you know that Whitney Houston was a producer on this? Cool, right?

Now that I’m done fangirling over the powerhouse actors in this movie, let’s get on with it.

First, let’s get a few things straight (wink wink). If you were a tween during the late 90s/early 2000s, then you might have been obsessed with the original books series (like me). 

'Sup Meg Cabot

There were a few things that the movie didn’t get quite right that I want to point out quickly. Whether or not they contribute to the movie’s queerness, eh idk, you can be the judge of that. The two biggest things you need to know are 1) Mia’s dad isn’t dead, he was just kind of an absent father until they had to tell her about the whole Princess thing. Ultimate uncool dad move. And 2) the grandmother in the books is actually a horrible human being that Mia hates and she has tattooed eyebrows that gave me nightmares. Ugh. These changes make sense for the movie’s story arc, but what I liked about the original books was Mia’s rebellious, fuck the man, attitude, and she really loses that in the movie. Having her dad die instead of just being absent puts a sentimentality and “excusable reason” on her rebellion, which lessens Mia’s queerness. And the grandmother (if memory serves me, I think she had to call her grandmere?) served as an antagonistic figure on whom Mia could throw her frustrations. As much as I love Julie Andrews, the conflict between traditional norms/the strictures of being royal and Mia wanting to be a normal freaky teenager get diluted.

Anyway, on to the film.

Mia is so very queer. She and her bestie Lily Moscovitz (the awesome and OUT Heather Matarazzo) are outsiders at their high school. 

Who's that dude messing up our bestie pic?

They look at the popular, uber-hetero, kids with admiration and disgust; that particular mixture of feelings only present in the teenage mind when you still gave two fucks about your popularity status (right?). Mia is invisible and weird to her classmates. She pukes during her public speaking class and gets laughed out the door. She’s awkward and clumsy, not to mention the glasses and untameable hair. She’s invisible, crushing on cool-guy-douchebag Josh from afar, wishing she wasn’t queer, and wishing for the popular kids’ normalcy. It’s hard out there for a queer.

But Mia’s got some things going for her. She lives in an abandoned firehouse (LITERALLY THE COOLEST THING EVER) with her artist mom whose idea of a night in is throwing darts at water balloons full of paint, 

Take that patriarchy!

and she works part time at a rock climbing place. Her life isn’t really as bad as she makes it out to be. Despite her frustrations, her queer life is actually pretty cool.

Then, everything changes. Julie Andrews comes to town and tells her she’s next in line for the throne of Genovia. Oof. This little queer girl is a bonafide princess. You can’t get much more normative and traditional than a princess, no matter whether you are talking about fairytales or IRL royalty. The whole movie ends up being about Mia’s identity and her queerness battling the normative expectations closing in on her life.

Here are the two things I want to look at with this.

First, the big beauty transformation. Hellooooooo Anne Hathaway.

bow chika wow wow

What’s telling here is her reaction to the makeover. It makes her super uncomfortable. She gets really defensive when Lily sees her new ‘do. And when she gets to school she doesn’t want to show off her new look, she hides it all under a hat. When someone finally steals the hat off her head, her newfound normative beauty makes heads turn. People start to notice her, but it’s not really what she wants. She doesn’t know what to do now that she’s no longer invisible. She’s lost some of her queerness and she’s having a hard time adjusting. She’s starting to conform to normative beauty standards and it feels weird, unnatural even.

Next, her decision to become a princess (after she tries to run away). I’m not so interested in the whole legacy, father part of the storyline. I want to focus on how Mia eventually comes to terms with her queerness and this new normative world she must navigate.  The defining moment here is when she smears ice cream all over popular-girl Lana’s (Mandy Moore in her early 2000s prime) pristine cheerleading outfit. Mia decides that, after the whole beach party/Josh fiasco, there are parts of the normative world she doesn’t want to participate in. The part that’s frivolous and fake and judgemental and basically just awful. Instead (and after quite a bit of turmoil), she decides to take advantage of the position she has been handed within the normative world. She decides to use her queerness to infiltrate and invade that normative world. She decides to “care about the other 7 billion people out there instead of just [her].” She decides to be an advocate and voice for the people. She realizes how much power she has access to and that she can use that power for good.  I think this is an incredible model for how those with enormous privilege should use their voices to lift up those 7 billion+ people who do not have the same power/resources/rights/etc. You go girl!

As you wish, Julie Andrews

MVQ: Mia’s mom! She’s the coolest. I mean the paint-balloon thing! The firehouse! Genius.

OTP: Lily and Mia. Does a ship name for them exist? Mily? Lia?

Favorite Moment: Mia coning Lana!